On Sunday, I had to remove Desari and his alts from the guild. A few days prior, he had been unanimously voted out by the officers. We gave him more time to set things right, but he refused and was finally given the boot.
Basically for the last several months, Desari has become the biggest source of drama this guild has seen since the Paper Bagging incident of '06. He has become increasingly irate and blew up over the smallest things. He would complain about things people were doing and then do them himself. He held grudges against random people for trivial reasons, putting them on mute and ignore.
He sent tells to individuals telling them off and showing huge amounts of disrespect to specific players he decided to hate randomly. We're talking the kind of maturity level and language you'll see on Hyjal forums or trade chat from disgruntled teenagers.
He complained about loot and progress becoming selfish and demanding. The complaints about his attitude started rolling in by the people who were his comrades and friends for many years.
Slowly he lost the respect of more and more guildies. Many officers, myself included tried to talk to him to find out what his problems were and let him know it was bothering people and totally wasn't acceptable. He responded badly to any attempt to figure out why he was acting this way. He found it hilarious that people were complaining about his behavior. He even responded to it once by saying the entire guild can go fuck themselves.
We gave him weeks to figure things out while he continued to display incredibly hateful and childish attitudes toward the guild and guildies. Eventually we all voted to remove him from the guild, but even then we still gave him more time to work things out.
I finally removed him from the guild on Sunday after a 10 man ICC run when I tried to invite him through the Calendar system only to find out he had me on ignore in game and mute on vent. No doubt /ignore is required for relaying the complaints of his peers to him and trying to help him resolve his issues. It was clear at this point that he *wanted* to be gkicked, probably as a childish means of justifying his leaving to begin with.
I have not had to gkick a member since the early days of Timeless in 2006 when another healer went emo. (Why are healers so emo??). They are usually mature enough to leave when they are ready to leave or when they are asked to leave (both of which fit Desari's case).
The fact that we gave him so much time to work things out is a testament to the amount of respect he had and lost over the last month alone. Anyone else would have been removed far quicker for repeating such behavior as often as he did. He even managed to get on Ameerah's bad side, which is a feat in itself for someone who likes everyone.
While we're losing a high attendance player, he proved to us that the person he is now is not a benefit to the guild. The Desari we knew and liked all these years left several months ago. I suspect when a certain legendary piece went to another healer instead of himself, perhaps when he became an officer... who is to know (or care at this point).
Desari
Thanks for posting this.
Atelo always gets the rap for being an asshole while the rest of us don't. This (generally) isn't fair, since the officers make decisions together; he's just the one that ends up telling people what we decide. This was an unfortunate situation, but I think we made the right decisions.
Also, I have 114 vanity pets, 27 more than Atelo.
Atelo always gets the rap for being an asshole while the rest of us don't. This (generally) isn't fair, since the officers make decisions together; he's just the one that ends up telling people what we decide. This was an unfortunate situation, but I think we made the right decisions.
Also, I have 114 vanity pets, 27 more than Atelo.
Thanks Atelo. I never had issues with him and think we got along, but I always felt bad that he deguilded when we were talking in guildchat. He was complaining about something and I asked him how he would solve the particular issue. His response was to deguild and I was afraid I had caused something spontaneous that wouldn't have happened otherwise.
A lot of people tend to go off the deep end after playing WoW too much. I just hope he works out whatever is bothering him, and I would venture a guess that it's something in his real life, not the game.
A lot of people tend to go off the deep end after playing WoW too much. I just hope he works out whatever is bothering him, and I would venture a guess that it's something in his real life, not the game.
